the tale of 'mysushidiet'

Others pegged my blog as a food blog because it has the words "sushi" and "diet" together. Well, it does sound like one but it isn't a food blog or anything of the sort. The contents are far from being enticing and mouth-watering. It's more of an "anti-boredom-spill-the-beans-cry-your-heart-out" kind of thing. Yes, very self-serving. ikr.

I remember going through an emotional time when I decided that I needed a blog. Hence, the birth of mysushidiet. It was just so I can have an outlet. Somewhere where I can say anything about anything... somewhere where I can write the things that I was too afraid to say. This is why my posts are primarily about frustrations, anger, pain, disappointment, and the like because these are the things that I refuse to just keep to myself. Ever since, writing has always been my way of releasing the negative energy in me with the hopes of reaching out to the reason/s behind my posts without having to go through the dramas of a confrontation. Blah blah.

Deciding that I want a blog was easy. Deciding what to name it was the hard part. It may not be that big of a deal to others but to me, it is. I have high standards on this particularly because I myself don't pay attention to blog sites that doesn't draw my attention. So I figured it has to be something that sounds good and unique and vague since I don't plan to focus on any topic like fashion, travel, food, or whatnot. I didn't want it to sound uber melodramatic or melancholic in any way and I didn't want it to sound boring or serious either. So I thought of my interests, favorites, the trivial things about me, and etc. and that's how I came up with mysushidiet.

I've always been a sushi freak. Yes, I'm that girl with a Chinese bloodline who will always choose sushi, sashimi, gyudon, and etc over noodles, siopao, and dumplings without second thoughts. As for the word 'diet', well, to me, diet is like love - something that I want so much but cannot commit to. Luh. San galing 'yon?

Anyway, this blog has been up and (quite) active since November of 2007 and it has always been mysushidet. At one point, I thought of changing it to something else, something more creative and more catchy and cute but I kinda feel odd just thinking of doing so.

I guess I'm really not good with changes and goodbyes. Well. who is, anyway?

Right click. Open in new tab. Read. Repeat.

My birthday is fast approaching - 26 days to go, to be exact. Last year, I promised myself that I will celebrate my birthday anywhere but in the Philippines, for a change. Hence, I dedicate every bit  of my free time on reading various travel blogs to educate myself on different travel tips, travel hacks, efficient spending, travel routes, and whatnot. I am really learning a lot but apart from learning, the "traveler-wanna-be" inside of me is getting giddy more and more as I keep on reading on others' adventures. I am beginning to think whether or not this is my calling. OA.

I am amused by the stories of successful full-time travel bloggers. How I wish I am brave enough to do what they did - left their job and traveled the world. Most of them make a living by maintaining their travel blogs. How I wish I can do that. Someday, maybe?

My blog banner says it all. I am a sporadic writer. So how am I suppose to make a living out of this? Not to mention the fact that I only write a lot when I am depressed or sad. Not unless I can make money by writing about my frustrations in life, heartbreaks, and everything else that I always write about. How would I sell my sadness? Who would want to buy or invest on something melodramatic? Seriously? Although now, I am trying to write as often as I can and I am trying my best to shy away from being melodramatic. Law of attraction. Law of attraction. I always remind myself about this.

Wish me luck and make it appear convincing as if you really care. Ktnxbye.

A minor epiphany: Win-win Situation

You gotta be thankful for meeting shitty people, really. Why? Because it's through them that we get to see who the really good ones are. Being with shitty people makes you appreciate the ones who were actually genuinely good.

Meeting the wrong ones make you feel more excited in meeting the right one. Or maybe, I already met him? *pabebe smile*

Hello, 2015.

New Year means a lot of different new things to many different people. New goals. New dreams. New priorities. New hobbies. New plans. New house. New car. New hairstyle. New resolutions. Anything that can be used or done to signify change, which is really fitting for this occasion. New Year's eve is like point zero - the perfect point to start something. 

Speaking of "new", I had my hair cut again. I think this is the shortest I've had since 2010. It's not the boy cut kind of short, though. Prolly just an inch or two below my nape when wet. I feel five yeaars younger. Thanks to Bench Fix. Lol.

The mandatory "my-hair-looks-tame-and-presentable-until-it-gets-wet" shot.

It has been said by a lot of people that we don't need a new year just to change. They're right. However, making some changes or wanting and planning changes is a lot more fun and perfect every time the year changes. It's like creating a momentum for yourself. It's really just about starting the year right, right? 

Thing is, no matter what it is that's new with you or no matter what the changes you made or plan to make, we all have one thing in common: HOPE. Hope that these changes will render positive results. Hope that by the end of the year that has come, we would be able to tell ourselves that we did it. We changed. FOR. THE. BETTER. Yes, in bold and all caps for additional emphasis.

Here's to consistency, positivity, unfaltering faith and endless hope... CHEERS!! May we all have a great time this year! 

From our family to yours, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

When blogging doesn't seem enough

I'm not sure of what I exactly feel right now except that I know I feel bad. My mind is cluttered with sad thoughts and I think I am mad. Not the mad "crazy-mad" but the angry kind of mad. I don't understand why am I in this position when all I did was be a good friend in the way I know how. Why do I need to be in this kind of situation? I really feel so bad about the things that I can't change; of the people that I thought I grew close with; of the friends that I thought I'd always have; of the happiness that's drifting away; of the part of me that I no longer love. It's like seeing too many familiar things in a new light; feeling lost in a place you've always known. It's too complex and it's changing me in ways I no longer cope with. I'm tired. Dead tired.

I am 25.

When you get to "THE" stage of your life where you, sooner or later, would be altar-bound, your priorities, goals, perspective, and lifestyle change. Everything changes. At least for me.

Growing up + Feeling grown up = Another (higher) level of maturity

When I was younger, I thought the perfect life plan is to get married at age 24 and have a baby at 25. That was the kind of life schedule (if I should call it that) my mom had so I wanted my life to happen that way too. But I realized, it's really not something that can be scheduled or planned.

So here's the thing, I am 25. Not yet married, not even engaged, and (fortunately) not yet a mom. In short, the life plan I constructed for myself was more like just some random note doodled on a scratch paper out of boredom that should go directly to the trash bin and be recycled. But hey, I do not feel any remorse about this. I'm happy the way my life turned out to be. I am young. I have a loving boyfriend, a stable job, and lots of good friends. I am living a pretty much happy life.

Last night, I got myself to thinking and it has dawned on me how I've matured and changed over the years. From thinking about booze and monopoly nights with friends, taking a leave at work for a dance gig, random movie nights, and the like, I now think of saving up for the future, taking up masters degree, job promotion, marriage and family. Wow, things are really different now. I am still the same person though, only with different priorities. Different goals.

I am at a point in my life where:

Boyfriend comes first before family.

Work before leisure.

Church before play.

I don't mean this is in any negative way. We were taught that family should always come first and that was what I was taught too but things are different now. I am now building a life of my own. A life that only I can make or break and it's not like I love my family any less. I love them just as much, prolly even more. Thing is, I like to build with my boyfriend a relationship as deep as I have with my family because I know someday, he will be my family. We will be each other's family.

Life is never simple nor easy. It's not like a movie where you write the script and everything just falls accordingly. It can change faster than a snap. It's your response to the changes that determines how your life will go. It's your life... live it. Just some tip though, if you think you've had it all figured out, you haven't. *naughty grin*

To Multiply or Not To Multiply?

While transferring files from my desktop to my new baby, I saw this folder saved as "For Multiply Upload". So I opened it and boy, was I surprised of how many subfolders were saved there waiting to be uploaded. It has been a long while since I last opened my account. I even had to retrieve the password, imagine that. As per records, my last photo upload was dated October of 2009.

Due to some changes that happened in my life this year, I was reluctant to use my existing Multiply account since it was full of memories of my past. I even considered making a new one. but then I thought, so what if it has too many memories of my past? It was a part of my life no matter what happens and a new multiply account won't erase those memories and it's not like I would mean to that. I've always been good in keeping memories, especially the good ones.

So I decided to keep my old account and to update it. It'd be interesting to browse the account maybe after a year or so and see the transition from one chapter of my life to another. I just wish there's a way to change the user name though; but since there's none (yet), I guess I'm stuck with it.

Check out my Multiply Page: http://zen06.multiply.com
The Brief Online Documentation of my Life :)

Dreams.

What's with today? Is today "weird dreams" day?

For some unknown reason, I woke up an hour earlier than my alarm clock. As in, I went off the bed and opened the door, walked out of my room and called for my mom. I just kept saying, "Ma? Mama? Ma?" in a searching tone.

I really have no idea why I did that. It was the first thing that popped in my mind and I don't know why. I am not like that. I mean, I don't just do such things unless I feel scared or worried. That's why I find it so weird. I am neither worried nor scared. It left me feeling uber weird and uncomfy the rest of the morning.

Perhaps it really wasn't supposed to mean anything.
But I feel like it meant something.

Or maybe I miss my mom.
We haven't been able to talk like before the past few weeks.

On a less weirder note, Erik and I had the same dream TODAY. We both had a dream that he was already home and that we went to the beach. I don't know what it's supposed to mean, having the same dream and being together in THAT dream but I really do think it means something. It's actually sweet and I felt really good. Maybe we just miss each other so much. Mushy as it may sound but perhaps, our love has found a way for us to spend the summer together. Sounds impossible but who knows I might actually be right, right?

Maybe, these dreams are my unique, subconscious way of coping with the changes that has occurred recently in my life - Erik leaving for Saudi and Mom getting busy with the family business. They are the two people that I hold closest in my heart and I miss them...

EVERYDAY.