falling apart.

I woke up with the urge to re-read everything I've written here. Maybe I need a validation of how wrong I am when I wrote yesterday that I haven't learned anything for the past 24 years. I need this. I just feel so down since I don't remember when and I want this feeling to go away. I am emotionally tired. The thought of failing has never motivated or challenged me in anyway. In fact, it caused me to drown myself even more with thoughts of how I am falling apart. I am never good in turning negative things into positive thoughts. I no longer have the ability to see the brighter side of things. The fire has died out a long time ago.